Top 10 things I didn’t anticipate about maternity leave
# 10: That Edgar Snyder buys as much ad time as he does.
# 9: That I really WOULD nap when the baby napped and let the housework wait. (Didn’t think I had it in me!)
# 8: That the UPS guy would show up so often with gifts for the baby. (He probably thinks I only wear PJs!)
# 7: That I’d find myself occasionally singing the Stanley Steamer jingle. (Stanley Steamer makes YOUR home clean-ER!)
# 6: That the first time I left the house without the baby, I would miss him in less than two hours.
# 5: That I really was able to not routinely look at my work email.
# 4: That I even let my personal email account go untouched for weeks at a time.
# 3: That I’d have EVERY charge made to my flexible spending account while on leave questioned. (It’s called MEDICAL LEAVE for a reason, people!)
# 2: That I could literally blow away a whole day staring at my kid in amazement.
And the #1 thing that I totally didn’t anticipate was that I’d actually receive a PAPER check, from my employer, via SNAIL MAIL for the grand total of $0.00. Yes folks, they actually paid more to send the check than the value of the check. EVERY other paycheck from these people has been electronic. Go figure out THAT one!! I think it might frame it. I love the business unit in which I work, but the dolts in corporate just never cease to amaze me with their stupidity. Ah yes, so glad to be back…
